The moment I changed for me - not an audience.

Embracing growth and personal transformation on this journey of self-reflection. 🌟 #PersonalGrowth #MyJourney

I used to work with an older guy, and it looked like we were from two different worlds. I was a young Black woman in my early 30s with a short, stylish haircut. He was an older white man with glasses, salt-and-pepper wavy hair, and a sharp, witty sense of humor. He was a literature professor.

The one thing we had in common? Writing and literature. That was our world.

He used to say in his lectures, "If you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life.”

If I took nothing else from him, I took those words. And they apply to my journey now.

After hitting several obstacles in my writing career, I realized something had to change. I noticed a pattern: whenever I stopped feeling validated, my content would shift. The moment I began transforming or trying something new, the response — or lack of response — felt like a cold blow to the stomach.

It felt like abandonment. And I’ve had abandonment issues.

So I would retreat. I’d go back to content that was easy to digest. Pleasing. Safer. But I never grew.

It wasn’t until I started working on my spiritual journey that I began to quietly change. I realized my intuition lives within me. I don’t have to look outside myself for validation.

The quiet stopped scaring me. The fear of change turned into doing what I love — for me.

As I kept creating and releasing, the audience became quieter.

But this time, it didn’t bother me.

Because I loved the work.

Trying to change for others is exhausting.

I mean the kind of exhausting where you’re working overtime just to please your parents. Creating art based on what you think your audience wants. Shaping yourself to fit expectations.

That’s two overtime shifts with no break kind of work.

That’s not doing what you love.

Doing what you love means owning your piece. Indulging in who you are through your work. Creating because it moves you.

Your only audience is you.

When you create for likes and approval, you subconsciously put pressure on your audience to validate you. If they don’t respond how you expect, you feel rejected. Then you scramble.

It becomes like chasing a moving target.

And now your happiness is tied to strangers in cyberspace — people who barely know you, and definitely don’t know the vision God placed in your heart.

That’s too much weight to carry.

No wonder you hear crickets sometimes.

You handed them the responsibility for your worth.

Here Are 4 Reasons to Do It for Yourself:

1. It’s More Authentic

Readers and viewers can feel when your art is real. They can feel when it’s forced. Energy translates. Authenticity resonates.

2. Less Pressure

When you change for you, there’s no rush. No proving. No timelines. It’s just you against you — becoming better than yesterday.

3. Your Craft Improves

When you stop performing, your nervous system relaxes. You focus better. You compare less. Growth becomes meaningful instead of competitive.

4. Emotional Well-Being

Changing for yourself is self-love. It builds resilience. It frees you from destructive habits. It aligns your life with your values instead of external expectations.

5. Increased Confidence

Overcoming the fear of being judged builds self-trust. And self-trust builds confidence. Nothing feels better than leveling up without abandoning yourself.

Now let me talk to you directly.

You are not behind. You are not invisible. You are not late.

You are learning how to create without performing.

That is a different level of maturity.

And maturity rarely goes viral.

But it builds longevity.